Thursday, April 19, 2012

some thoughts.

It has been a while since I have jotted down some thoughts. I get so caught up in posting pictures because it is much easier and faster for me to do! But I have had a few things on my mind lately that I feel like vocalizing. First off, I just feel so gosh darn blessed! And I want to mention how appreciative I am for my wonderful friends and family. And especially for my handsome husband-- He is the hardest worker, and I look up to him more than he knows. What a hard job husbands have! Not only their actual occupation...but having the responsibility of providing for a family, being the head of the household, working & going to school, and choosing a successful-yet enjoyable career path. I hold so much respect towards hard-working fathers and husbands for all that they do. I think of my own father and how much sacrifice he has made to become the successful father that he is. I have gained a greater love for him as I have grown up and have had to go to school and work and it has made me truly appreciate all that he went through in his early years of marriage, in order for me to have had the wonderful upbringing that I have had. With that being said, I have felt an overwhelming feeling of love for my husband and for all that he is doing for Ellie & I. What a wonderful feeling it is to know that no matter where life takes us, no matter what our income is, no matter where we live, I will always feel like the luckiest woman to have such a loving, supportive, trustworthy, hard-working husband...and on top of that-- a sweet, amazing daughter to keep me going ;)

I have changed my life perspective around completely in the last year. Of course, meeting Ryan had a lot to do with that because no one has made me happier! But I have truly realized that attitude and perspective in this life is so crucial for success. To me, it is all about how we view things that determine our happiness. Yes, it is not always easy to do... especially when times are tough-- but if we just take a moment in all the chaos, stress, sadness, or whatever we might be feeling at times, and just count our blessings and focus on the love that we have for others, our hearts will be softened and things will be okay. During hard times, when I find myself thinking selfishly and am often focussing on me me me... I have to stop and slap myself and change my focus & attitude towards helping others or loving others more. Whenever I do this, I instantly feel better. Service has been so important in my life, and it is something that I wish that I was better at. But my goal is to bring more service into my life, and try and think of others more. Doing this, helps bring the focus off of what is going wrong in my life, or what could be better, or whatever I am going through at that time, and it helps me think of others while at the same time it helps me to be a more loving person towards others. I think of the most loving, thoughtful, uplifting people.....Debbie Cusick, Stacy Strong, Whitney Hansen, Karen Cope, Cyndi Madsen and many many more people who have touched my life in so many ways....who make me want to be a better individual inside and out. I am thankful for all of those positive examples in my life, and I hope to work as hard as I can to be that kind of a person to at least one-if not more people in this life.

One more thought that I have to vocalize, is how much Ellie has blessed my life! Raising a child is easily one of the hardest things to do.... but boy, is it rewarding. I try so hard to be a good mom, and sometimes I think I fail.. but it is from those small little hugs and the "i love you mom" 's that keeps me going and makes me feel like I am needed and loved. I think that one of the most important things that I want my kids to know as they grow up is that I love them unconditionally. No matter what! Luckily for me, I had the example of parents who loved me unconditionally growing up, and I am so thankful that they did.

My heart is full today with gratitude towards those people in my life who have lifted me up, who have stayed with me through all my ups and downs, and who have loved me unconditionally. I truly look up to your examples. What a wonderful experience life is! To learn from our mistakes, to love others and to be loved, to exercise our faith, and to try and become the best people that we can be. I believe that we don't have to try and be perfect...because perfect is boring ;) I am trying to put my focus towards enjoying this journey of life, and embracing the flaws and hardships because those are the things that polish us on the inside and make us stronger in the end.


  1. Good on ya mate! Its not easy to go through life, raise children, nurture a family, and such but boy is it ever worth it. I was thinking about my husband the other day. There we were sitting in church together and I realized he hadn't done that with his parents, he's never had a fathers blessing, or the priesthood in his home, yet he has made his life so that he can give these great blessings and more to our new little family and our son Henry. The atonement creates so much joy in this life. I'm so happy for you!

  2. michelle-
    just a few things:
    -i can't think of anyone that makes any bad situation positive the way you can, do you know what a gift that is? not many people have that gift.
    -you're an amazing mother and one day Ellie (and your future children) will be saying the same thing about you that you are saying about your own mother and father.
    -you're one of the most selfless people i know.
    -you married a great guy.
    -ryan married a great girl.
    -your parents are wonderful and raised great people.
    -i love you and your family.