Friday, October 28, 2011

gratitude

I have been posting a lot of pictures lately and not so much writing. I am going to try my best to not overload you with cheesy happiness, but I may or may not be able to resist. :)
I have had an overwhelming feeling of joy in my life lately, and I wanted to share a few thoughts with you!

I have been through ups and downs, trials and triumphs, and made more mistakes in my 23 years of life that I can even count.. but I am grateful for them. Every single one of them. I can't tell you enough how much I believe in the saying, "Everything happens for a reason". I now know that I definitely would not be where I am right now if I hadn't had gone through what I have. In the past few months, I have been surrounding myself with positive people and I have been making healthy choices, and taking care of my body--and the difference it has been making in my life is night and day! It feels SO good to be able to love myself again and realize how I want to live my life and how I deserve to be treated. I don't mean that in an arrogant way, I just have realized that everyone deserves to be happy and to be treated like royalty. I look back on the last 5 years of my life and see a lot of wasted time and mistakes and negative influences, and it makes me sad to think that it took me so long to realize what truly makes me happy. But that's ok! Because that is what life is about.  I think a lot of the time, people try and impress others and change themselves to make others happy, or even to try and make yourself happier. I was very much this person for wwaayyy too long.

I was lucky enough to have found someone who brought me back to reality, who knew me before I lost myself, and who helped me realize my inner beauty. I don't know how I got so lucky, and I will forever be grateful for him! But along with help from him, I was determined to change my outlook on life on my own and change my inner thinking that has been engraved in my head for so long. I think the first step that I took came from something that my old boss said to me and it has stuck with me. She said, "Life is what you make it" and she explained that life is to be enjoyed not endured. At one point in my life, I took a step back and realized that I was living life only to endure it, and just trying to get through each day. That just makes me sick to think about! Life is for us to grow and learn, but most importantly to be happy and love ourselves and others, and to ENJOY every moment!  Once I realized this, I started to make a change. It was not easy for me. I gave up a lot of my old habits and ridded my life of negative things/people who were bringing me down. Life should be filled with positive people who lift you up and bring out the best in you and who love you unconditionally. And life is about making choices that better you as a person.

Another thing that I needed to learn was to love myself. Because of trials in my past, I didn't have self confidence or felt any self worth. I went to therapy after therapy, and it helped. But the thing that helped me the most, has been surrounding myself with genuine people who want the best for me and who treat me with respect and love. Then I automatically saw that it is possible to be treated like a queen and that no one should have to settle with being treated any other way. I even got discouraged at times because I felt that since I had made so many mistakes, I didn't really deserve to be treated the best. That is TOTALLY false, people!! Everyone makes mistakes and that is what life is all about is learning from them and becoming better people from those mistakes. That is why it is so important to surround yourself with people who love you unconditionally. Those people will stand by your side no matter what and help your through any trial that you may have. I am truly grateful for those people in my life.

I want to share with you an article that someone sent to me. I absolutely loved it.

1. I followed my heart and intuition
2. I said what I needed to say
3. I did what I needed to do
4. I made a difference
5. I know what true love is
6. I am happy and grateful
7. I am proud of myself
8. I became the best version of myself
9. I forgave those who hurt me
10. I have no regrets

Read it HERE

I LOVED this article! It talks about taking action, and being productive, being true to yourself, and how gratitude=happiness.

My favorite part was in #5, and I just want to quote a part of it.

"Finding a companion or a friend isn’t about trying to transform yourself into the perfect image of what you think they want.  It’s about being exactly who you are and then finding someone who appreciates that. Love is beautiful and unpredictable. The best thing you can do is to start to become the most outstanding person possible. The universe will know when you are ready, and when you are, true love will happen, unexpectedly."

I highly recommend everyone reading this article! I know that I still have a long ways to go to be able to say all of these about myself, but I don't expect myself to be able to yet. That's what life is about:) All I know is that I am on the path to be able to be the best version of myself, and to be able to live my life the way I want to live it.
I am so blessed to have Ryan in my life right now, someone who I look up to and who makes me want to be that better version of myself. He is trustworthy, positive, smart, funny, respectful, non-judgemental, and most of all-- he loves me for me! He knows all of my past, and I can be myself around him and he will always love me.  I feel truly blessed to have him in my life.
I am grateful to have such an amazing family and amazing friends. I am grateful for meditation and being able to take time to relax and think about all of my blessings. I am grateful for the power of positive thinking. I am grateful for Ellie and for her warm hugs. I am grateful for my father for his example and for the way he treated my mother. I am grateful for the examples of my older brothers. And most importantly, I am grateful for the opportunity to feel clean and happy again. Everyone can feel happiness. It is just up to you! :)

P.S. This lovely surprise left on my desk may or may not have helped me with my positive attitude today;)

12 comments:

  1. You just made my cry. This is so true. All of it.

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  2. go you. you're awesome and I'm so happy for you. just since I've seen you these last two times at soel I can tell how happy you are--you glow! love ya

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  3. Great post and great article...way to go! Always lots of love to you.

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  4. Great post, great article...courageous woman! Always lots of love to you on your journey

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  5. I'm so glad you are so happy. I loved this post. You and Ryan are ADORABLE!

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  6. honestly, i am so happy for you! life is so much more enjoyable when you are constantly surrounded by people who adore you.. im glad ryan can be that for you. (and ellie of course) and im not just saying this to say it.. but we really should go on a double date sometime :)

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  7. I am so glad. :) It's true, every bit of it.

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  8. Beautiful. And why is loving ourselves so hard to do? Its the one thing I want to teach my girls more than anything else. It effects so many aspects of life...the people we surround ourselves with, the amount of love we have to give others, how big we dare to dream, etc. etc. blah blah blah. Great article. Great post. Yay for happiness. :)

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  9. good to read this. thanks for sharing Michelle, and so fun seeing you the other day. :)

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  10. Wow! So much wisdom and strength! Michelle I am so impressed with your growth and understanding. The article was wonderful. Thanks so much for being you!

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  11. great post michelle... very eye opening :)

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